By Marjorie Brook, LMT · Licensed massage therapist, 29 years · Creator of the S.T.R.A.I.T Method™
Published October 2026 · Wantagh, New York

How to Advocate for Yourself at the Doctor: Never Surrender Your Voice

At some point in many people’s lives, they come to realize that no one knows their body better than they do.

Whether you’re dealing with chronic pain, recovering from surgery, managing a long-term illness, or simply trying to understand why something doesn’t feel right, one lesson becomes painfully clear: you must become your own patient advocate.

Unfortunately, too many people leave a medical appointment feeling unheard, dismissed, or even made to question their own experiences.

They are told, “Your tests are normal,” “It’s just part of getting older,” “It’s probably stress,” or “You’ll have to learn to live with it.”

But normal test results do not always mean there isn’t a problem.

Pain is real.

Fatigue is real.

Loss of function is real.

Fear and frustration are real.

And if something feels wrong, you deserve to have your concerns taken seriously.

You are the expert on your body

Healthcare professionals bring years of education and clinical experience.

That expertise is invaluable.

But there is one thing they don’t have – they don’t live in your body.

Only you know what has changed.

Only you know how your symptoms affect your daily life.

Only you know when something simply isn’t right.

Your observations are not insignificant. They are clinical information.

Nobody had ever asked him

Marjorie on the client who changed her practice.

My very first client in the student clinic had been coming to that clinic for ten years.

Every single note in his file said the same thing. Lower back pain.

I came in to work on his back, and he was on the table, and he had scars all over the front of his body.

A large zipper scar up his midsection.

A smaller one down his right side.

Another on his ribcage that I first took for a fatty tumour.

I was about to graduate and nobody had ever mentioned scars to me.

Not do this, not don’t do this. It was not discussed.

So I asked him whether I could work on his scars.

He said, “Nobody’s every asked me that before.”

Within three or four sessions, the lower back pain was gone.

He is still my client today, and he is also my accountant.

Ten years of appointments, and the question nobody had asked him was the one that mattered.

That is not a story about a clever therapist.

It is a story about what gets missed when nobody looks at the whole person.

And about why the person most likely to notice the thing everyone else walked past is you.

Being your own advocate doesn’t mean being difficult

Many people hesitate to ask questions because they don’t want to seem confrontational.

Advocacy isn’t about arguing with your healthcare provider.

It’s about becoming an active participant in your care.

That means:

• Asking questions until you understand the answers.
• Requesting clarification when something doesn’t make sense.
• Seeking a second, or even third, opinion when necessary.
• Bringing notes, timelines, or symptom journals to appointments.
• Respectfully speaking up when you feel your concerns are being overlooked.

The best healthcare happens when patients and providers work as partners.

Tell somebody the part you left out

Here is something I have learned from running classes rather than from treating one person at a time.

No matter how many times you ask somebody to write out their medical history, you still have to ask extra questions.

People leave bits and pieces out.

Sometimes they have forgotten. Sometimes they would rather not remember.

I had a woman volunteer in a scar tissue class with a fifteen-year-old C-section scar.

It was barely visible on the surface.

As I started working above the scar, she said it felt like I was driving a railroad spike through her back.

A few minutes later she mentioned, almost in passing, that it had been an emergency C-section.

And that the epidural had gone wrong and left her temporarily paralysed.

None of that had been on her form.

And then something else came out.

She had gone to her doctors two weeks before the birth and told them the baby was too big.

Nobody listened to her.

She had been right, and she had spent 15 years carrying what happened next.

If there is a detail you have been leaving off the form because it feels irrelevant, or because you would rather not go back to it, that is often the detail that explains the rest.

Don’t let anyone dismiss what you’re feeling

One of the most damaging things that can happen is when patients begin doubting themselves because someone else dismisses their symptoms.

You know your body.

If your symptoms persist. If your pain continues. If your function is declining. If your quality of life is suffering.

Keep asking questions.

Keep searching for answers.

Keep advocating for yourself.

History is filled with stories of people who were repeatedly told nothing was wrong, until the right practitioner finally listened.

Persistence can change lives.

And if you are a parent, you are the advocate in that room, because children almost never get one.

Healing is more than test results

Medicine has made incredible advances, but not everything can be measured with a blood test, MRI, or X-ray.

Scar tissue dysfunction, fascial restrictions, nerve irritation, movement impairments, and many functional problems can significantly impact quality of life while remaining invisible on traditional imaging.

A test that doesn’t explain your symptoms is not proof that your symptoms don’t exist. It simply means the answer hasn’t been found yet.

Trust your instincts

Your intuition is an important part of your healthcare journey.

If a diagnosis doesn’t fit. If a treatment isn’t helping. If you feel rushed or unheard. If you’re told there’s nothing else that can be done, yet your body tells you otherwise.

Listen to yourself.

Seek another opinion.

Find practitioners who listen, investigate, and treat you as a whole person, not just a collection of test results.

You deserve to be heard

Every patient deserves compassion.

Every patient deserves respect.

Every patient deserves to have their concerns acknowledged.

Never give away your power simply because someone has a title after their name.

Expertise deserves respect, but so does your lived experience.

Your voice matters.

Your experiences matter.

Your symptoms matter.

And your health is worth fighting for.

Because no one will ever be a stronger advocate for your health than you.

If you have been told to live with something and your body disagrees, call 516-409-1240 and tell me what is going on. I will tell you honestly whether I can help. No referral is needed.

Frequently Asked Questions About Advocating for Your Healthcare

What do I do if my doctor says my tests are normal but I still have pain?

Normal test results do not always mean there is no problem. Many functional problems – scar tissue dysfunction, fascial restrictions, nerve irritation, movement impairments – can affect quality of life while remaining invisible on traditional imaging. A test that does not explain your symptoms is not proof your symptoms do not exist. It means the answer has not been found yet.

How do I advocate for myself without seeming difficult?

Advocacy is not arguing with your provider. It is asking questions until you understand the answers, asking for clarification, seeking a second opinion when you need one, bringing notes or a symptom timeline, and speaking up respectfully when you feel overlooked.

Should I tell my therapist about an old injury or surgery I think is unrelated?

Yes. People leave things off their history, sometimes because they have forgotten and sometimes because they would rather not remember. That detail is often the one that explains everything else.

Do I need a doctor’s referral to see you?

No referral is needed to book. If your insurer wants a prescription for out-of-network reimbursement, there is a physician’s prescription form in the Forms section of the patient info page.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Marjorie Brook, LMT created the S.T.R.A.I.T Method™ for scar tissue release and has practiced it for 29 years in Wantagh, Long Island. She trains therapists internationally and has taught clinical staff at Singapore General Hospital and Shriners Children’s Hospital. About Marjorie → · Book an appointment →